December 02, 2008

Book of Love

While perusing the news today, I learned that a 9-year old Colorado boy named Alec recently wrote a book that is being published by HarperCollins. After the blinding red flashes of jealousy cleared from my field of vision, I read a little more, and decided that his book - How to Talk to Girls - sounds cute but also annoying, like the little feel-good books my mom puts in my stocking at Christmas, such as "Children’s Letters to Santa" (Look how adorably naive first graders are!) and the like. I hate them because I have a cold heart that is reviled by Chicken Soup but then the cute children eventually wear me down and I laugh.

That being said, it appears that some of Alec’s advice really should be heeded, by boys of all ages. Here are some of his tips:

"Comb your hair and don’t wear sweats."

"It is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry. Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil. The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you."

"Don’t act desperate."


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